"Enjoy every moment."

I posted this on Facebook this evening:

Which led to me thinking for the umpteenth time about those women (with grown children) you occasionally run into in the grocery store who look at your child(ren) with a wistful smile and then tell you to "enjoy every moment."

For the record, I know how very, very fortunate I am that I get to be the mommy to my son and the little one we're expecting in September.

I am in a position to be able to choose to stay home with my children, and I know that there are other women out there who want to do the same and aren't able to; I realize what a privilege that is.

But I will tell you the truth: some parenting moments are more "have to" than "get to." Like cleaning up vomit. Or dealing with tantrums. Or waking up ridiculously early. Or changing poopy diapers. Overall, I wouldn't trade this job with anyone, but I'd be thrilled to have a pinch hitter or designated barf cleaner every now and again.

So when people tell you to enjoy every moment with your young children, just keep in mind that they themselves definitely didn't. They're looking back with rose-colored glasses at the parenting-of-young-kids experience as a whole. The cuddles, the wet kisses, the enthusiasm, the not being embarrassed to be seen with you in public. Those things are beautiful and wonderful and you should absolutely try to enjoy them as much as you can. But the moments (or days - or weeks) that you don't enjoy? Don't feel bad about them. That's not you being a bad mom; that's you being a human being. Being a good mom doesn't mean that you have to be filled with ecstasy by every single moment you spend with your child. And the more time you waste feeling guilty that you honestly just hate bath time, the less time you have to bask in the moments when your little boy pats your face and says "Mama best lady."

So if you're a little worn out by parenting today, give yourself a break, a pat on the back, and a piece of chocolate. And if you should happen to stumble across a company that has someone on call to clean up vomit 24 hours a day, could you please pass along the phone number? I'd really appreciate it.

Things that are awful #92: Packing

I had a post that was about 95% completed to post on Christmas, and then I forgot to finish/post it. So, um. I hope everyone had a fabulous Christmas! Now here's some random whining...

Ever since I was a kid attending summer camp, I've had this problem with packing. If I don't finish packing more than a week before I have to leave to go somewhere, I start having dreams that it's time to leave and I suddenly realize I haven't packed anything. Or I've packed all the wrong things. (A week before my wedding, my brain took a break from wedding-disaster nightmares [ie, It was our wedding day and I realized I had forgotten to book a reception venue. Our organist couldn't come because his wife was in labor, so his brother filled in, but the only song he knew how to play was "Jingle Bells." Our whole wedding party changed into muddy jeans and sweatshirts right before we were supposed to have photos taken,] to dream that we arrived at our honeymoon resort, I opened my suitcase, and I realized I had only packed socks. Just a suitcase full of socks.) So I have to start packing ridiculously early to stave off the nightmares.

And I have to pack everything. EVERYTHING. I always pack more clothes than I could possibly wear even if I changed three times a day. For a weekend trip, I pack enough underwear to last me for a month. Because you can never have too much underwear. You just can't.

Yes, there really is a suitcase under there.

(I periodically see article/blog posts/Pins with titles like "How to pack for two weeks using only your carry-on" or "Pack enough outfits for a month with only six items of clothing," and I laugh and I laugh, because I can only assume they were written as jokes.)

And now that I'm a mom, it's gotten worse. Because in addition to thinking things like, "But what if I only bring gray yoga pants and then I suddenly really, really want black ones?" I now have this whole other person to overpack for. "I already packed the blanket that says "Lucas" on it, but what if it's bedtime, and he decides he needs the guitar blanket? I'm bringing his sweatpants and khakis and cargo khakis and jeans and athletic pants and fleece pants, but what if there's an occasion that demands corduroys?" Like I said, I have a problem. The ultimate in packing anxiety happens if I'm flying, because airlines have this rule that your suitcase can only weigh 50 pounds or less, and if it weighs 51 pounds, you have to pay a million dollars (give or take.) Which makes it very hard to pack all of the shoes you own, just in case.

Anyway, my newest strategy that is (kind of, maybe, just a little bit) helping me to be ever-so-slightly less ridiculous is that I pack everything Lucas and I own (like always,) but then a day or two before it's time to leave, I take everything out of the suitcase, and then before I put each item back in, I ask myself questions like, "Ok, but do I really need eight pairs of pajama pants?" (Answer: yes.)

There's really no point to this post other than for me to whine a little bit. But if you have any awesome packing tips, please share them in the comments! As long as the tips aren't things like "You should only pack one pair of pants and two shirts." Because you'll give me nightmares.